Time for a 'Realitcheck'

You're only as old as you feel. Or at least, I believed in this old saying until I went to a Jay-Z concert the other weekend in State College. 

My friend Albra and I were crossing the parking lot after the show when two college-aged guys behind us started taunting us: "Your age is right up my alley girls,ha, ha!" and “You guys are old!”

"I think those guys back there called us old," Albra said.

"What? Are you sure they were talking about us? Maybe they were talking about my brother and Sean," I said, who were walking five feet ahead of us.

"No, they were talking about us," Albra said.  
 
I may be 33 years old, but that doesn't mean I can't like current popular music. Or attend a concert. Heck, most days I forget how old I am. In my mind, I'm still 17 years old. That's why I am so in tune with the young crowd, right?  

First thing I noticed as we approached the Bryce Jordan Center that night was the long line of girls wearing butt-baring miniskirts and stiletto heels. I don't think I've ever seen so many stiletto heels in my life. These gals had them in every color -- gold, black, gray, red. As we all waited in a line for a security check, I could not help but point out the array of 1980s hooker outfits to my friend.  

"Look at that skirt," I said as I pointed toward a girl ahead of us who had a black spandex skirt. The bottom of her butt cheeks were peeking out. "And those shoes, they look like hooker heels."

It took us half an hour to move through the line in the pouring rain. The concertgoers kept piling up in line behind us, and so did more girls with provocative outfits.

"I just saw a girl actually changing out of her sneakers and into her stiletto heels. She was wearing a short bubble hem skirt. That skirt was so short, she could barely bend over when she was changing her shoes!” I whispered to Albra. Once we were admitted inside, I saw more of the same. My poor feet ached just watching these girls dance around in their stilettos.

I looked around at the new face of Penn State University and thought back to my days over 10 years ago as a college co-ed there. No one dressed this boldly back then. What did these girls think -- that Jay-Z was going to ask them to hop on his tour bus after the show? And now I'm being called old because I wore a cable knit sweater and jeans to the show?  
 
A few days later, when I started getting over the burn, I thought of something. Had I really stood in line and critiqued all the girls’ outfits? Was I not, at one time, a 20-year-old woman who wanted to look sexy? And then I remembered a few skirts of my own, now long gone at a Goodwill store. I remembered I had a red plaid skirt I used to wear when I went to see bands at local bars. It was the kind of skirt that I was afraid to bend over in, for fear "it would all hang out." I used to go out with my friends and wear halter tops or black dresses with fishnet stockings.  

Now that I am in my 30s and dress more conservatively, does that make me any better than these girls? I suddenly was ashamed of myself. I pictured myself as a white-haired 80-year-old lady, standing in line tsk-tsking these young girls and cackling about "Oh, your skirt is too short young lady!" Then it dawned on me. Maybe I am "old." Maybe I really have grown up and crossed the line from my 20s into my 30s. I guess a little realitcheck now and again doesn't hurt.